Free All You Wanted to Know About Sex by Hari Datt Sharma Page A

couple in privacy. It lays the foundation of the future sexual relations. The first night is supposed to be the most important event in the life of the newly married couple.
    First night experience is filled with more significance for the girl than for the boy, but for both it is regarded as a religious rite in many countries. The boy has usually been taught the art of love making by his friends and elders, but for the girl the first experience of intercourse is regarded as once in a lifetime event. Therefore the husband should initiate his wife into sex gently and in the spirit of service.
    In many races, religions or social rituals postponement of first intercourse for two or three days after the ceremony is prescribed. The husband should keep himself under control during the love play before the first sexual union. The prelude, with all its tender affection and admiration, kisses, embraces, gentle caresses should be given the main role. The more intensively erotic and definite stimulation should be sparingly applied.
    To demand that the timid bride should yield her body suddenly and completely to the gaze of even the most beloved man, would be unreasonable and like not caring about the feelings of the bride. No woman should be expected to remove all her clothes on first night. Even to show his own erect penis to her unaccustomed eyes, would only terrify her. But every bride is not so shy and chaste.
    At first night try to be natural. Talk about her hobbies, interest, subjects of choice and acquaint each other with your familial details. Never rush to consummate the marriage by physical union. Having talked and known each other, make physical advances with all its tender affection and admiration, kisses, embraces, gentle caresses should be given the main role. If you like any part of her body express your admiration by kissing that part. The women open up very gradually because a bold bride is believed to be a woman of easy virtue. The groom should be sensitive enough to judge his bride’s reaction by her facial expression and gestures. Gradually arouse her sexual feelings to move towards the desired goal.
    The first most important work is the defloration or the rupture of the hymen. This is located at the opening to the vagina. In fact it makes the boundry between the external and part of the genitals which develop from the skin and the internal structures of the sexual reproductive system. In some women the hymen may be more or less retained as a perforated, soft sheet of the skin, in some girls this tissue present during infancy seems to dissolve with growth, so that only slight remnants are seen as soft tags around the vaginal entrance.
    In some cases the hymen is usually thick or strong. Forceful entry of a penis will overcome the obstruction. Though the woman may feel some discomfort. In rare cases, it may be necessary to consult a physician, who can snip open the hymen to allow access.
    Various cultures foster the myth that all first instances of hymenal penetration are painful and show bleeding. To accomodate these expectations, women often feign pain and discomfort; To ensure the presence of blood stains; a woman or her mother may see to it that there is some blood available, perhaps from a freshly killed chicken.
    In some women the pain caused by hymen rupture interferes with the enjoyment of first coitus. But there is not always pain or even discomfort.
    A newly-wed bride feels very shy and dreadful. The victory of desire over dread is often very slow and difficult. She fears of the impending pain from her torn hymen. It exists in the highest degree in the ignorant girls who know nothing about coitus or the hymental membrane. So, defloration means the beginning of the most important changes and events in a woman’s life. It is the beginning of active sexual functions, with all their results, duties and dangers. In any case whether this reluctant fear be unconscious, subconscious or conscious, it should get due