Free The Strip Club Dating Survival Guide by Jason Keeler Page A

may be a handicap should you accidentally find yourself in some kind of parking lot brawl, bar fight or other altercation. I suggest avoiding those kinds of situations irrespective of whether you wear a tie or not.
     
    If you do decide to go with a tie, or your outfit just doesn’t look right without one, loosen up the collar. Don’t pull the tie askew as if to suggest that your day at the insurance brokerage just kicked your ass sideways, and you can’t breathe from all the fucking excitement. Instead, artfully loosen up the tie as if you think you’re Michael Buble  about to hit the stage in Vegas or something.
     
    And then there are shoes. If you have to scrimp on the cost and quality of your wardrobe due to financial constraints, shoes are the one place you should clearly make an exception. The quality, perceived cost, wear and condition of a person’s shoes say a lot about what kind of person they are, and this is something that most women are somehow directly jacked into.
     
    If you look and feel fantastic, but your shoes are crap or are falling to pieces, any woman with half a brain in her head will make a mental note that you are full of shit, even if she doesn’t actually call you out on it.
     
    Your shoes don’t have to be some ridiculously expensive set of Italian loafers, but they shouldn’t be picked up from your local discount retailer for $15 either. Even if you, for some reason don’t care what other people think, I promise you that shelling out a minimum $100 for a decent set of kicks  will make you a happier, more confident person.
     
    The extra effort required to make sure that you look, smell and feel fantastic when you come in physical contact with soft, half-naked women is worth the relatively small amount of time and money that you’ll have to invest. Shop around for the stuff you wear, balancing quality with cost, avoiding the standard reliance on big-box retailers for your wardrobe.
     
    Try, whenever you can, to have things tailored . If money is an issue, check your local dry cleaner for cheap tailoring services. It won’t be as slick or comprehensive as you would get at a men’s clothier or tailor, but they can usually make sure your clothes are the right length, and the waistlines fit correctly. Most guys don’t think of it much, but the accuracy of a hemline or fit of the pant waist can often make a dramatic  difference in a man’s appearance.
     
    This is another helpful hint: place a mirror near the front door of your house or apartment. Get in the habit of checking yourself before walking out the door. Being forced to stare at yourself for a moment before going out in public can help you catch any issues with your appearance, as well as giving you the opportunity to practice looking good, standing tall, and projecting a confident persona.
     
    Remember that how you look makes a statement about who you are; so take the time and effort to be a man that any stripper you meet will be attracted to.
     
    Oh, and quit biting your fingernails, you savages .

Chapter 6. Love Machine
I’m in love with a stripper.
 

- T HOMAS O TWAY, AUTHOR OF THE 1681 COMEDY, “ T HE S OLDIER’S F ORTUNE” IN WHICH THE TERM STRIPPING WAS FIRST USED IN REFERENCE TO A WOMAN TAKING HER CLOTHES OFF FOR MONEY.

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    Despite some of the things I have said so far, I truly do like strippers, quite a bit, in fact.
     
    That’s why I would hate to think that some kind of misogynistic dick might be reading this book, thinking he’s gonna lay down all sorts of heinous crap with what he may learn from me. It’s particularly fucked when you stop to consider that he’d be pulling his shit on some unsuspecting girl probably sitting beside him dressed in nothing more than her underwear and a smile.
     
    Growing up without their dads and not knowing what to do about it is the only crime most strippers are actually guilty of, thus becoming the target of some man-boy’s asinine crap fetish is something both