Free Song of the Sea Maid by Rebecca Mascull Page B

the laundry and other rough work. I am thinking that I could work for you. I could manage the collection, dust it and take care of it, and help in the kitchen with preparation of healthful food for you, sir. And I can sew very well and be a kind of permanent seamstress for you. In return, I would require only a bed in the scullery or the garret, which I would put away in daylight hours. And I even know the art of wig keeping and could help your valet when necessary. Matron has taught me a thousand skills, sir. And if—’
    ‘Enough!’ cries Mr Woods. ‘I have no need or desire for a lady’s maid!’
    ‘But sir …’ The words catch in my throat, as panic rises there. To be sent away from this place, to lose my lessons, my discussions with Mr Applebee and chats with Mr Woods, my lunches with Susan, my afternoons spent in the curiosities room – it would not be an exaggeration to say at this moment I feel I will wither and die without them, or at least my mind will and all hope of happiness.
    ‘Will you curb your prattling tongue for one moment, child? I wish to offer you something quite different. Now sit here, stop your noise and listen. You must know how very fond of you I have become, child, over the years. I am a bachelor and after me my name will become extinct. I wish to offer you a home here, for as long as you require it or desire it. You would have your own rooms and unlimited use of my collections. I would settle an annual income on you, so that you can continue your studies unabated. Legally, I would make you my ward. Our good friend Applebee alerted me to the idea and I agree it. I have become accustomed to our fireside talks, which provide a welcome escape from the rigours of business and the social whirl. I would miss them if you were to leave. I would miss you, my dear. This is to be your home, Dawnay, if you wish it. Well, child, do you wish it? Now will you not speak, when it is required of you?’
    But I cannot speak, for I am afraid I will weep without end if I do.
    ‘Why do you cry? Is it tears of joy?’
    ‘It is that word, sir.’
    ‘Which word?’
    ‘ Home .’
    I take my leave of the asylumwithin a week. I am given the same brief ceremony all the other graduates are given, complete with a final meal of back bacon.
    The founder stands me before all the other children, looks me squarely in the eye and pronounces thus: ‘You are a singular girl, Dawnay Price, with some skills and facilities. Soon you will be of age. Endeavour now to remake yourself in the image of a good wife, for the female that wast the last and most complete of the creation was designed by Almighty God for a comfort and companion to mankind. As you grow in years, child, may you exert yourself to grow also in goodness. For your exit must every day draw nearer, and your proximity to the next world is beyond, and your inevitable farewell to the follies and indulgences of this world will be complete. Therefore, live every day as if you were to die at the end of it, and think on your salvation, for it will slip through your fingers if you do not handle it with care.’
    Inwardly, I take from his speech a meaning I am positive he did not intend: that is, to live each day as if I were to die at the end of it , and therefore to live with reckless disregard for convention, regulation or fear of consequence.
    Before I leave the house, Matron takes me aside and makes her own speech: ‘As you know, I am a childless spinster. I have no delusions about my role here in this house. I prepare orphans for a life of service and I do so efficiently. But I am not made of stone. ’Tis a special child that wins my heart and none but you have owned it so completely. ’Twas the stealing of the quill did it, dear. Never have I seen such life and determination housed in a tiny frame. You do have a peculiar effect on people; as I think I told you once, even your namesake, the gentleman who found you, told me he had no interest in wretches until he