Free Palmer-Jones 03 - Murder in Paradise by Ann Cleeves

over and James had opened the door, he loped up the aisle to be there first, and stood there, in the sunshine, with a vacant, begging leer. They all knew what he was doing, but no one took pity on him.
    Melissa did not have to find the courage to approach Agnes, because Agnes came to her. Melissa was still sitting in the pew at the back of the church, and Agnes broke way from the rest of the family and sat beside her.
    “It was good of you to come,” Agnes said.
    “I had to come today.”
    “Mary would have liked the service. She couldn’t join in but she liked to watch the children singing. James spoke well. He’s a great comfort.”
    Melissa did not want Agnes to be too comfortable.
    “I have to go now,” she said. “James will be waiting.”
    “You won’t come back for dinner?”
    “No.” She could feel the old panic. She had to be out of the church. She had made the effort, and now she had to be away. She stood up.
    “Oh well,” Agnes said. “Another time, then.”
    Melissa hurried outside and waited for her husband at a distance from the others so that she would not have to speak to them.
    Outside they stood, talking together in the sunshine, the Stennets and the Dances, but when they started walking away down the hill to the houses, they split into separate family groups and each went their own way.
    At Sandwick Sarah felt in the way. Maggie was helping Agnes in the kitchen and her own offer of help was refused. The men were talking about sheep. It seemed impossible to her that they could talk about sheep after such a tragedy. In the end she went outside and played with Maggie and Alec’s children, until they were all called in for lunch. Then she felt childish and irresponsible.
    Over the meal Maggie tried to organize the domestic affairs at Unsta.
    “We’ve put some of our meat in your freezer, but you’ll need to order more from the butcher in Baltasay, until your beasts go for slaughter in the spring. You’ll have to buy groceries through the shop here—Kenneth Dance has some arrangement with the wholesaler over there, some fiddle, and they won’t sell directly to individuals.”
    Sarah listened to the lecture, tried to be interested. Nobody mentioned Mary. It was as if she had never existed.
    They all sat crowded round a table which was not big enough, in a room too small and hot. The men piled their plates with food. After the meal Sarah was allowed to help with the washing up. She watched Agnes absentmindedly blowing her nose on a tea towel and felt that she had seen enough of Jim’s family.
    She had expected it to be different. The short space of time on Kinness had been as crowded with events as the Sandwick kitchen was with people. She needed to be on her own for a while.
    “I think I’ll go for a walk,” she said, “while it’s still light.”
    “Shall I come with you?” Jim was looking at plans with Alec. He would not have minded going, but he was interested in Alec’s ideas and he was pleased when she said she would go alone.
    When she left the house she hesitated, uncertain of which way to go. She was used to signposted footpaths on her walks, and was frightened of damaging crops or offending people’s privacy. She was beginning to find her bearings on the island, but decided to follow the road north towards the harbour where they had landed the day before. In such a strange place it was reassuring to take a road she already knew. She walked quickly and quite soon passed the school house. Then the island became wilder, less cultivated. On one side of the road was the hill, bare but for heather and sheep, and to the east a low marsh crossd with ditches. There, just by the side of the road was a derelict croft, roofless, much of its walls pulled down, the stone used for building the dyke which marked the beginning of the Kell land. Kell was built into the hill, windswept and exposed to north-easterly winds, sheltered only to the west. The fields around the house were small,