Free Chained Reaction by Lynne King

 
    Chained Reaction
    Lucy stood by the window watching the rain
trickling down the glass. Michael’s plane should be landing now, if he had been truthful about his destination. He hadn’t
told her the name of the hotel in New York, but then she never
asked.
    The phone started ringing. Reaching out for
the receiver, her gaze remained on the scene outside, a rainbow now
arching over the horizon.
    “Hello,” her despondent tone echoed her
mood.
    “Lucy, is that you?”
    “Jamie!” Leaning against the cool pane, the
pleasurable shiver took her by surprise. She had tried to envisage
this moment for so long, what she would feel and how she would
react. Hearing his voice again was a fantasy that she’d clung to
through each day.
    Reality was that she never thought she would
hear him speak her name again.
    Her throat was dry and she wanted him to say
more, but he was waiting for her. She took a deep breath and
allowed the words out slowly. “When did you get out?”
    “Yesterday. Early release on account of my
good behaviour. Hard to believe, wouldn’t you say?”
    He sounded so distant and Lucy felt at a
loss as to what to say next. There was so much, but nothing she
could put into words, not yet anyway.
    “Are you okay?” Stupid question, she knew,
but for the moment accusations and recriminations no longer
mattered. Hearing his voice again with its faint Irish twang was
what she had longed for, prayed for, and she wanted to savour it.
He was in her thoughts day and night and all she longed to hear was
confirmation that nothing had changed between them.
    Instead his voice was tinged with a
bitterness she had known would be there. “I managed to survive for
four years and sixty-five days living like a caged animal but
otherwise from that, I’m fine. Is he there with you?”
    “If you’re referring to Michael, he’s in New
York for the weekend, on business.” She wanted to add that Michael
combined business with pleasure and made no secret of it, but what
was the point. The mistake had been hers to move in with him in the
first place, especially when she knew it wasn’t done out of
love.
    “Didn’t take you long to return to him. He
always said you would and for once he was right.”
    She felt the accusation in his voice,
evidence that he still cared. With it came the feeling of hope that
it wasn’t over between them. “It’s not how it looks. Michael’s been
good to me.”
    “Are you happy?”
    “I knew happiness once and it broke my heart
so now I’m making do.” She squeezed her eyelids shut fighting back
the sorrow.
    He released a long sigh. “I’m sorry for what
I said earlier. I just wish it wasn’t him. You deserve so much
better. Far more than I could ever offer.”
    She couldn’t stop herself from asking now,
after so many unanswered questions and so much pain and for what?
“Why, Jamie?” Just because he thought she deserved better? She’d
loved him and was willing to wait for him and for that he’d turned
his back on her. “Why did you refuse my visits and return all my
letters?”
    “I had nothing to give you.”
    She wanted to scream the truth at him but
she was afraid. What if he knew all along and didn’t want the added
responsibility? It couldn’t be said, not like this over the phone.
She had to see him face to face, only then would she know for sure.
“Where are you now?”
    The silence told her he was nearby. She
could hear the rain mixed in with the steady sound of his breathing
and something else. Yes, she recognised the background sounds. The
distinctive chime of the Victorian town clock was her confirmation.
He was outside their local railway station.
    “I’ll be there in ten minutes. Don’t forsake
me again, Jamie.”
    Finally he spoke. “Is that a good idea,
Lucy? Nothing has changed, I’m still the bastard who let you down
and will do it again.” The warm masculine tone promised her nothing
and yet drew her in like a moth to a flame.
    “You rang me, remember.