Free Rockstar Daddy (Decoy Series) by K.T Fisher

mouth to speak but he cuts me off before I'm able to.
     
          "I'm not letting you drive home on your own Kendal. If you don't want to walk I'm driving. I drove James over, he can follow us in my car."
     
    I watch Finley playing outside, he seems happy enough. I'm not harming him keeping Jax from him am I? I thought that that was the right thing to do. But as Finley is getting a little older there's moments when I feel Jax should be here. He has asked if he has a daddy, I told him he has but he lives far away. He took that fine and carried on.
     
         "Should I tell Jax? I want to but Finley's happy isn't he? What if Jax doesn't want to be apart of his life? Or his so angry with me? Did you get Max and Leo's address or number?"
     
    Mark lets go of me and frown down at me, Jessica stands by him and wears the same frown.
     
         "You know that Jax will never resent him Kendal. I can't believe you would think that. I've said this from the beginning, he never would have. He needs his dad, being with Sam, James and Mark is fine and yes he loves them but there not his dad. He needs Jax Kendal, he might be angry with you but he can't be forever. You have to understand what you did."
     
    She gives me a hug and I know what she's saying is true. Mark shakes his head.
     
          "No we didn't get anything from them Kendal."
     
    Why does he look a little angry at me? If they had gotten there numbers I could have asked for Jax's number. Doesn't he get that? I hate that they all think bad of me, I'm a terrible person. What person lies to the father of there child. Jax wakes up everyday not knowing he has this beautiful boy as his son. I can't believe what I have done. I wonder if Jax would be where he is now if he did know about Finley. Could he still have lived his dream and be a father? I guess we will never know now.
     
    Jessica lets me go and Finley runs into the kitchen, clean face now. Mark won't let it go so I just give in and let him drive me home, even though it's only around the corner. I say goodbye to everyone and hold Finley's hand to the car while Mark sulks behind me. Honestly what is his problem? Not even five minutes later Mark pulls up in front of my house and opens my door for me and then Finley. He hugs me goodbye and looks a little awkward as he says goodbye. He gives me a little kiss on my cheek and gets into his car with James. As soon as we get inside we go straight upstairs and I get Finley ready for bed. It's getting late and I suddenly feel tired. I finish reading Finley his bedtime story and set it back on his shelf.
     
          "Mummy?"
     
    I smooth down his messy hair.
     
       "Yes honey?"
     
          "Who is Jax?"
     
    My hand pauses on his hair and I bite my lip. Bleddy hell, what do I tell him?
     
          "You remember when mummmy said your daddy lives far away?"
     
    He nods his head and I get myself together. I have to tell him, I won't lie anymore.
     
         "Well, Jax is your daddy baby."
     
    I see him take this in and he yawns.
     
          "Did he make you cry?"
     
    Jesus why does my son have to so observant?
     
          "No honey he didn't make me cry, I cried because I missed him."
     
    Yes thats seems that a good enough reason and it also feels like it's true too.
     
          "You miss daddy?"
     
    I gulp. I didn't think I would be talking about this for a long while yet.
     
          "Yes I miss your daddy Finley. Maybe we will see him again."
     
    He nods at me with a big smile and his eyes roll and his lids look heavy. I stroke his hair and his breathing slows and evens out. I remove my hand and sit and stare at my beautiful baby lying asleep. His such a good little boy, caring for me like that. It's scary how much he pays attention to, I will have to be careful from now on when Finley is near. While I'm looking at him I decide there and then I know I have to tell Jax. Finley does need his dad and I can't hide the fact that I feel