Free Black and Blue: BWWM Romance by Solae Dehvine

life but certain things that happened weren’t what I took the oath for. How could I honor and protect with racist guys on my squad? And how could I call myself an upstanding citizen if I allowed this to continue?
    I thought of all those questions on the way to my car and all I could come up with that Alicia’s father was right. If I wasn’t a part of the solution, then I was the problem.
    “Brian, what are you doing here?” Out of the blue I saw Alicia walking towards me but she was the last person I wanted to see.
    “I have to go Alicia.” I kept walking, hitting the alarm to my car and getting inside before she could come closer to me.
    As I drove away, the look on her face broke my heart but maybe it was better this way. We were too different and her father confirmed that. Maybe we were better apart.

12

Black
    I stormed into the restaurant knowing that Brian’s ghostly white face was the result of only one man. He did that to people often and right now I was sick of it. Take away my tuition and the loft but he was going to hear the truth; finally hear how I felt.
    “Hey Alicia honey, your dad just stepped away for a phone call.”
    “Where?” I barely said hi to Deidra. My head was on a swivel, hunting for my father. She pointed in a direction and I went. I found him in a small hallway near the bathrooms with his cell phone pressed to his ear.
    “You son of a bitch! What did you say to him?” He spun around like he had seen Malcolm X reincarnated.
    “Tom, let me call you back?”
    “Yeah, what did you say?”
    “To your little friend?” He chuckled. “I told his ass the truth. No daughter of mine will be with a white man or she won’t be my daughter.”
    “I was never your daughter. You were just around for fluff. My mother took care of me.” I spat the words out. “Yeah, that’s right. You were so busy running around the country that you didn’t even know how old I was.” I could remember times that he would literally ask me what my age was. The man that lived in the same household with my mother and me since I was born didn’t even know how old his child was.
    “So you wanna talk down on me after all I did?”
    “You did what you were fucking supposed to do. You want a prize and a medal for that?” I raised my voice, feeling the tension between the two of us.
    “I finally find someone that wants me for me. Not because I’m your daughter, or because they want to just fuck me, but they genuinely want to be around me and you act like a complete asshole. Just like the people you fight against.
    “You hold on a damn minute, I am still your father.”
    “Are you sure you're my father? My father wouldn’t act like such a bigot. He would love everyone the way he would want to be loved.” He glared at me. If I was his son he would probably have pushed me against the wall but I was his daughter, a young lady in heels and wearing a skirt and makeup.
    “I just want you to think about that when you call yourself hating someone. It only diminishes the things you claim to hate. You end up sounding like a fucking hypocrite.” I turned on my heels, storming out past the people gawking at me, including Diedra, who had nothing to say.
    Back outside, I tried to call Brian as I walked to my car, but only his machine came on.
    “Brian pickup please. I’m really sorry about whatever was said. Please know I don’t feel like that.” I got in my car, slamming the door as the machine cut off my lengthy plea.
    I just wanted to rewind time and take everything back. I should have told my Dad that the rumor was true… Yes, I was dating a white man and so what? But instead it took me forever to unload about something that I should have said from the beginning.
    Never again would I lie, but only if I got the chance.
    What if he doesn’t want you anymore? Saying that a week ago wouldn’t have been so bad. But now, thinking of Brian not being around devastated me. That was it, I was in love and there wasn’t