Private told him.
âGnaghgnaghgnaghgnagh!â Skipper replied.
Skipper swung his giant flipper at Private. Now it had a wicked-looking claw at the end. Private dodged again.
âListen! This isnât you!â Private told him.
Skipper paused. It looked like he was thinking it over.
Then he swallowed the cat.
âNo! Bad Skipper!â Private yelled.
Skipper lunged for Private again. This time, Private didnât dodge him. Instead, he slapped Skipper across the face.
âOh, dear,â Private said. He would never dream of slapping Skipper. Not even a horrible, mutant, cat-eating Skipper. But now he had done it!
Skipper stared at Private. The slap jarred something in Skipperâs brain. Images flashed through his mind. Baby Private, hatching from an egg. Private giving Skipper a silly salute. Private making an adorable sad face.
âPry-vit?â Skipper asked.
âYes! Thatâs it!â Private said.
âPrivate! Youâre alive!â Skipper cheered in his normal voice.
Skipperâs body was still mutant, but his brain was back to normal. He hugged Private, laughing and then sobbing.
Then he coughed, and the cat jumped out of his mutant mouth.
âSorry,â Skipper told Private. âItâs just that I thought you were a goner.â
Mutant Skipper and Private hurried to find the rest of their team. They spotted mutant Kowalski getting ready to throw a trash can through a storewindow. His flippers had transformed into tentacles! They ran up to stop him.
â Urgh? Hissssssssssssss! â Kowalski flailed his tentacles at them.
âGet a grip on yourself, soldier!â Skipper said. âThatâs an order!â
âHeâs not getting a grip!â Private pointed out.
âWait! Iâll speak Mutant Zombie Penguin to him!â Skipper said. He turned to Kowalski. âGerbitwaaahbuggahissss!â
Kowalski paused . . . and threw the garbage can over Skipper and Privateâs heads.
Skipper shrugged. âWell, thatâs all Iâve got.â
Kowalski menacingly slithered toward them.
Private thought quickly. âKowalski, Eva is worried about you!â
Kowalskiâs mind instantly snapped back to normal.
âShe is?â he asked.
Skipper patted Private on the shoulder.
âWhat did she say? Did she say my name specifically? Were there tears? Details!â Kowalski begged.Then it hit him. âPrivate, youâre alive! Come here!â
He hugged Private with his snaky flippers.
âThis feels a little awkward, but Iâm happy,â he said.
Then they heard a familiar garbled cry, and turned to see Rico on a kebab cart. A pair of wings had sprouted from his back! He chased away the cart owner by waving a flaming kebab, and then swallowed the kebab like a sword swallower.
âGraaagh!â he yelled.
âRico, you listen to us!â Skipper pleaded. âYouâreââ
Burp! Rico belched loudly and a puff of smoke came out. He smiled and waved.
âEh, I guess youâre kind of the same either way,â Skipper realized.
Then Rico noticed Private. He leaped down from the kebab cart and tried to kiss Private with his mutant beak. Skipper quickly separated them.
âSave your hug for the holidays, Rico,â Skipper told him. âWeâve got a mutant apocalypse to bring down!â
CHAPTER 20
Privateâs Sacrifice
Private quickly led them all to the ray.
âPrivate, you stole Daveâs ray!â Kowalski exclaimed.
Private nodded. âYeah! I thought we could use it to turn everyone back to normal.â He handed the ray remote to Skipper.
Kowalski peered at the glowing green serum inside. âItâs not that simple,â he said. âTo reverse the ray, weâd have to swap out the Medusa Serum with a fuel source of almost immeasurable cuteness.â
âYou mean, like, a chipmunk?â Skipper asked.
âNot cute enough,